Modern Australian
Men's Weekly

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Managing a Separation Under the Same Roof

  • Written by NewsServices.com

Managing a separation can be difficult for both parties, not to mention the children, family, and friends involved in between. Whether you are on amicable terms or not, there are a lot of strings to untangle, and it can take time to get to a place you are both happy with. So, add into the mix continuing to live under the same roof and you have a really delicate situation. However, managed correctly the situation doesn’t have to be as painful as you might think.

When it comes down to it, it’s all about creating new boundaries. If you stick to a few significant dos and don’ts you should be able to avoid any awkward mishaps along the way.

Do’s:

  • Agree on a good lawyer that has both you best intentions at heart. You’ll be dealing with Family law Sydney so have a look around and find the best firm to suit you both.

  • Split up children’s activities – if you are both participating in children’s activities it can be confusing for everyone on what the situation is, especially the children so divide up which parent will attend what in advance.

  • Socialise separately- It can be hard after years of attending the same social events with the same circle of friends. But ideally you need to think about how your friends would feel sharing an evening with you both together. It might create unwanted tension. Separate your social calendars for a more enjoyable experience all round.

Don’ts:

  • Share Mealtimes – Although it might seem like a nice idea to share pleasantries over dinner, it is important to set those boundaries and keep the peace instead of risking a heated discussion at the table. By separating mealtimes, it also takes away the temptation to talk about legal matters outside of the arrangements with lawyers.

  • Sharing a bedroom – This is a definite no, even in your weakest, loneliest moment through a separation, sharing a bedroom is not going to help you. Not only that but if you are separated and debating divorce, the court will want to review your living situation in order to decided on how to proceed.

  • Share bank accounts- This again is focussed on the legal side of things. You may have entered a cohabiting agreement as part of the separation and if so, it is very important to divide assets and be clear on who is entitled to what.

It may seem like there are a lot more technicalities than you originally set out to implement when you began your journey of cohabiting through separation. Nevertheless, it is important not only for the legality of your arrangement but also for both your mental heath and for those who are living with you or even around you. The most common reason for living together while separated is when children are involved and the overall consensus of maintaining their happiness, so following some key dos and don’ts will absolutely help you achieve this.

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